By: Lizzy Pace
Episode 9 (Air Date: 2/27/17)
Nick Chats with Ex Andi
Andi is back and Nick notes that it's surprising she's there "right before Rose Ceremony." Is it though? He says right before Rose Ceremony like right before Homeroom.
Nick: "Do you need a drink?" He liquors up immediately when someone comes in unexpectedly.
Nick: "So what the fuck is she doing here now?"
Vanessa: "I just don’t feel special. It’s a horrible feeling."
Nick: "So, to what do I owe this pleasure?"
Andi tells him she's just checking in with him, as all exes do to their former lover when they're deciding whether or not to fuck all their new girlfriends. Nick: "I just can relate to you a little more now... I have four very smart women. Very strong-headed women."
Andi jokes: "And they stuck around? Well, you know I have to give you a little shit."
The women start to arrive and Lord Harrison walks them to a freezing balcony to await Nick whilst he jokes around with his ex-girlfriend for our amusement.
Tiffany Trump: "He knows me almost to the core now."
I always think GOT whenever they show that Vale building.
Nick: "I have my insecurities about being the Bachelor. I have my insecurities about this world."
Nick and Andi remark on this bizarre conversation. Andi: "It is kind of weird."
Nick: "Last time you knocked on my door surprisingly, you broke up with me. You dumped me on national television."
Andi: "But now you're dumping 29 girls."
Nick: "I’m not going to get engaged just because I’m the Bachelor. I’m not gonna pick one just because she’s the last one standing."
Nick says every time he's with each person he wants to pick that one. Andi: "And you haven’t even been alone with them yet. You're finally gonna be alone with them all."
Andi: "Are you going to have sex with any of them then?"
Nick: "I'm honestly torn."
"Like I'm physically attracted to all of them. Like, as a man."
Andi gives Nick her woman's permission slip to fuck all of his contestants he sees possibility with. Andi: "I think if you see a potential for that girl to be standing there at the end and you getting down on one knee with her, then that lends itself, if you two agree. I think you have every right to get intimate."
Andi: "There's my feminist rant."
Andi: "Do you look back and you're like, 'Damn, I shouldn't have said why would you make love with me if you weren't in love with me?'"
Nick: "I didn't take till now to probably be like, 'Eh, probably not the best move.'"
He tells her his biggest regret is that it caused her hurt and "—for that I’ve always been sorry."
Andi: "We’ve both done our damage but like, don't let that keep you from anything now. This is like your one chance, and don't let something you did two years ago ruin that."
The women are freezing, waiting for Nick. Next-Bachelorette-Rachel: "My feelings are at an all-time high."
Vanessa: "I just want it to be over."
Tiffany Trump: "I don’t know what kind of parents they have."
Nick: "I’m sorry for making you ladies wait. I know it’s cold." He tells them each family was "uniquely special". He said it was too cruel to put Danielle or Kristina through rose ceremony but he's finally forced to have another one.
He gives a general speech to the girl who's going home before they even know who it is: "Um, for the woman I'm saying goodbye to tonight, how appreciative I am of-- of my entire time with you, and I just want to thank you so much."
Nick gives roses to Raven, Next-Bachelorette-Rachel, and Canadian Vanessa.
Nooooooooo Nick is sending Tiffany Trump home before he fucks her?!?!?! This is truly shocking. Corinne does the fakest cry in the world.
Tiffany Trump: "I’m sorry if I ever did anything to make you upset."
Nick: "You didn't do anything wrong ever... You have nothing to regret. Nothing to second-guess. Not a thing. You need to know that."
Nick: "I have such a love for you Corinne." Nick doesn’t give her any explanation.
Tiffany Trump: "Saying goodbye to Nick is like-- I feel like my heart is like, literally like, it's never going to be repaired."
Tiffany Trump: "I just want to feel loved the way it’s supposed to be. Why can’t I just have a normal relationship?"
Tiffany Trump: "I’m trying to, you know, say things that men think are appropriate. And you know what? I’m done. Done trying to show my men how much I worship them and how much I love them and I care for them and support them. I’m done trying to impress these men..."
Tiffany Trump: "I will never kiss up to a man ever again in my life. I’m tired and done... I want to go to sleep."
Nick Flies to Finland!
Nick: "Most of my memories in this world end with me getting my heart broken."
Nick: "I couldn’t imagine a more magical place for this entire journey to end."
Nick: "This is the most Northern place I’ve ever been… Only get a few hours of sunlight every day."
Raven’s Fantasy Suite Date
They helicopter around a national park.
Raven: "I totally can see my life with him." Nick: "It’s a relationship that’s like a choose-you-own-adventure book. Being with Raven makes me feel excited and a little crazy in a great, fun way. Raven has that Southern, sweet charm and that just wonderful, like edgy craziness. It’s like the perfect combination of salty and sweet.
Nick uses Raven as a human dart. Raven: “I feel like this could be an everyday thing.”
Nick: "When you found out your dad was cancer free. It was nice to see you get a little emotional."
Raven: "I'm a daddy's girl, for sure."
Nick tells Raven he tends not to date women like his Mom.
Nick: "I also want to be stimulated in other ways other than just physically... I hate folding clothes."
Nick: "Can you fold laundry?" Raven: "Yeah, I own a clothing store."
Raven: "I'm in love with Nick and I could spend my life with him."
Raven: "Hoxie wasn’t so bad, was it?"
They talk about her being nervous for a while.
Nick: "I've never been in this position before... I'm in my head a lot."
Nick: "Like, I don't have any like, expectations."
Nick: "Don't be nervous."
Raven: "Every girl wants great things, fireworks, and magic to happen."
Raven: "I’ve never told someone I loved him... I've never had an orgasm before." OK so she's this season's "virgin". This show loves to fetishize small town virgins.
"I think I could go there with Nick today."
Nick: "I had a great time today, um, watching you play darts."
Nick keeps itching his turtleneck sweater.
Raven: "Coming into this I was the biggest skeptic."
Raven: My ex said 'I love you' "when he was drunk but never sober." Nick: "OK, interesting."
Raven: "I never said it at all. The way I feel about you, I never felt about him." Nick: "Well, that's great."
Nick: "I'm just being Devil’s advocate... Do you think you could ever say it to someone not knowing?"
Nick then rips the drink from Raven’s hand.
Raven says a 30-minute sentence about feelings and how her Daddy prayed for her to have an "easy love." Nick: "You're getting me a little choked up."
Raven: "I do love you. It would be the worst thing I could do to not tell you that."
Nick: "It’s one of the most meaningful moments I’ve ever had."
Nick: “That was one of the best like, professions of love I think I’ve ever heard from-- not just like from like anyone ever telling me.”
Raven: "I'm like, sweating. Like, my hands are clammy. I like need more wine."
Nick: "It means a lot for you to not only say it, but to-- to think so deeply about this."
Nick: "I can feel the words behind the things that you are saying."
Raven: "I feel like he does love me too. Nick makes me feel extremely safe and I think that's like, the key ingredient to opening me up."
Raven: “I’ve only been sexually active with one man."
Nick gives Raven the Fantasy Suite Card and Raven accepts.
Raven: "I need to remind you of two things. One I’ve only been with one person. I want you to keep that in mind. My second thing is that my last boyfriend, my ex, who I was intimate with, never made me orgasm. Lost for words?"
Nick: “I was not expecting that.” Nick threatens to not sleep with the women in his confessional because, "Not sleeping with the women might help me get to that level." This is the most sociopathic thing he’s ever said. He takes her to a log cabin. Nick: "So like, it has a glass ceiling."
Raven feels "the butterflies, warm and fuzzies, pitter-patter of the heart."
Raven: "I think tonight is like, the biggest night of my life."
They are using whether Raven is going to orgasm when Nick fucks her as a cliffhanger.
Upcoming Scenes: Next week is 3 hours...
Lord Harrison: "Will Raven’s date come to a satisfying end?"
Lord Harrison: "When things heat up with Vanessa, will she get cold feet?"
Nick: "I’m not traditional at all."
Tag: Nick doing Rocky in the snow?